and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
So I stole cocaine from one of my Tinder hookups
And that is the most millennial sentence I've ever said
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
Randomize
