Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize