If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
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