I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
Randomize
