If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
Randomize
