I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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