the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
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