Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy�
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Randomize
