You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
