do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Randomize
