your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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