My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Everclear isn't food dammit
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