I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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