Betty ford says i'm here all night
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.�
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Randomize
