escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
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