I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
Randomize
