Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
Randomize
