so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
Randomize
