is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Randomize
