Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
