all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us�
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Randomize
