i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
