Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
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