I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
Its about making memories worth repressing
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
