big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
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