So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
Randomize
