Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
