Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
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