yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
Randomize
