I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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