and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
The air taste purple.
Randomize
