Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever.
I just woke up in my closet, wearing a pink cowboy hat and a pink thong...
I want my thong back.
I hate you tequila.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Randomize
