i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
So vagazzling was a success
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Randomize
