operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
Randomize
