and you said cock pushups were impossible
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Randomize
