Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Randomize
