I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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