new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
Randomize
