Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
Randomize
