Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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