So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Randomize
