i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
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