Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
I think im going to throw up on grandma
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
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