I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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