Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
you had me at cake vodka
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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