i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Randomize
