GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
