Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
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