Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize
