Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
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